“Run with your legs to be fast, Run with your mind to be faster, run with your heart to be unstoppable.”- A. Thompson

ImageI hate the dreadmill.  I really really hate the dreadmill!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel like Spring is never going to happen and it is a tease.  I decided I hated the gym and was going to tough it out for another year and it worked last year…but last year the winter was not nearly as bad.

ImageI hate it so much but there is this part inside me that keeps ticking.  It is the will to succeed.  I have had crappy runs all week except for Tuesday, but I am not worried because I want this more than anything.  I want to be that girl who amazes everyone and never gives up.  Why do I have such strong will and determination?  It is this easy:

ImageI do it for her.  I want to be her role model.  I became a better runner after I had Lilly and she loves it when I run and she is my best supporter.  She even has a little cow bell that says, “Run Mommy Run!”  I couldn’t ask for a better cheerleader.  I have this problem though.  I need to find more time and I need to suck it up and get more quality runs in.  I can’t focus on the distance because I know I can finish a half marathon and I know I can finish it in under two hours but what happened to the girl who could finish in under 1:38 minutes?  She is around here somewhere.  I keep talking about all these ways I can succeed but the math is not adding up.  When I got out of work last year and the year before, I was able to run before I picked up Lilly.  I am just going to have to find the time.  I would run six miles and then go pick her up.  Even if I can only run one or two miles, I need to make them quality miles.  I can do this but I neeeeeeeed to do it. 


     Weight:  I know I am not fat, but I am still heavier than before.  I need to drop the weight and I have been but it still isn’t working.  Lilly and I talked about it and we went to the grocery store.  She agreed to eat healthier with me as long as she could keep her macaroni and cheese.  So here is what I bought:

apples, bananas, lentil chips, hummas, sweet potatoes, zucchini, veggie burgers, and ingredients to make some vegan chocolate chip pumpkin cookies…they are my favorite and I already made them when I got home.  I also bought some tofurkey or whatever you call the tofu sort of burgers.  I do not know the names of all these things.  I also bought some organic potato pancakes in case I am too lazy to make my own.  I have a lot of healthy things already, but I am thinking of going strictly vegetarian or perhaps vegan.  I am open to ideas and I see a lot of benefits. I do not eat a lot of meat as it is and I love vegetables.  I do not eat a lot of sugar because of the diabetes looming over my head.  I figure this is a good diet and I am actually tired of all the shit that is in food.  This is of course not a cheap diet, but I think it Is a healthy way of life.  There is so much sickness developing in the world that I can’t help but wonder if it is from all the garbage we eat that is processed?  Anyhow, I figure that I will give this a shot.  I am not going to force it on Lilly, but she already eats organic macaroni and cheese and milk.  She is all good.  She eats really healthy already.  That’s my girl.  She asked me for yogurt today as her snack ha ha ha.


     The need for a coach.  I am not sure what to do.  In the summer I do not have a lot of races and I am planning on biking a lot.  However, I have the Marine Corps Marathon on October 26 and the Wineglass Marathon October 6.  I might do another marathon but I am waiting.  The only other race I have in the fall thus far is Bird in Hand Half Marathon in Lancaster, Pennsylvania on September 6.  I had a coach through the Syracuse Chargers, but I never get to go and I am always tired.  In fact, I should be at practice around 6.  I think a coach is an excellent idea, but I need a coach that can work with my time.  I do not know what I am going to do but I would love to have someone who can just run with me at least one day a week.  I can run the half marathon in my sleep but I want to kill the full marathon and make it to Boston.  This is my dream and I want to get there and I know I can.  I need help but I am not sure how to get it.  I guess I will have to keep thinking about it.  Hey, who wants to go for a 20 mile run with me at an 8 minute or even 7:45 minute pace?  Exactly…there are not a lot of people out there this crazy and I do not want to find another “interesting” running partner.


Moving onnnnnnn……..here is my race weekend preview I have put together to help get me stoked for this weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!


Race the Runways:  Saturday, April 5, 2014 Brunswick, Maine

Image I guess I thought that because the course was on the tarmac, the entire race would be dead flat, but this has a little elevation to it.  This is the half marathon course and it looks good.  I talked to the race director and he said they have had so much snow they have to keep going out and plowing the course so that the ice does not stick.  That sucks and on top of that they were supposed to get another 16-18 inches last night.  I can hear my mom swearing in Maine now.  I thought they wanted to move to Virginia.  Maybe it isn’t too late.  I hear the weather is a little warmer. 

Here is the medal you get at the end and there are some nice looking munchies which will be good for my 7 hours of road rage back to Syracuse alone.  Some day I will have a travel buddy I hope.  I am trying to talk Krista into doing some of these crazy races!  She works for the IRS and needs a break!!!!! 

ImageI think this is a pretty sweet medal myself and it will look nice on my wall.  This will be half marathon number 37 and my third half marathon in Maine.  I like Maine…some of the races are really hilly.  The Freeport Half Marathon was very hilly.


     So since I am trying to do the one mile race, I peaked at the records.  I do not know if I will be able to kick the girl’s record, but I am going to try my best.  I would love to do it and maybe if I get close enough I will be agitated to come back and try again next year.  Why?  Because I tend to miss things by a few seconds and it is ridiculously frustrating.


I would love to break a record, but even if I do not I know I will put my heart into it. 

Here is a picture of the nice trophies the winners get in case anyone wants to sign up at the last minute.

ImageAfter my excitement on Saturday, I will have to hop in my car and drive home.  The mile run is at 8:45 and the half is at 9:30.  I will hopefully be in my car by noon after changing and having some food.  I do not know if I will place, but I will stick around a little while because they do not mail awards.  I might be able to ask.  I do hope it isn’t long because I would love to be home  by 8 o’clock. 



Ithaca Skunk Cabbage Half Marathon (#38)  April 6, 2014 10:00am

This is near and dear to my heart because this is the first race that made me cry because I ran it and finished under 1:40.  Anyone who knows Ithaca, knows there are hills so I am proud of my time and I will never forget this race.

ImageLast year they changed the course and I think they added a hill.  I wanted to die and I was really tired.  I still ran better than I have been running recently.  I finished in 1:46.

ImageThe race starts at 10 and the weather is usually around 46.  This year it is only $20 to enter and you get a finisher medal.  I am excited to run this course and I remember having a great time.  I was annoyed someone took my boilermaker t-shirt(I hid it under a bush), but my stupid ex boyfriend has my boilermaker beer glasses so I would rather those had been stolen too!!!!!!!!  I love the water stops because they compete to win money for their favorite charity so they are really interesting. 


Favorite race so far?  It is really hard to choose.  I know my all-time favorite course is the Wineglass Half Marathon because it is really well run and I have a pr there of 1:37.  However, it is not my favorite medal and I am shocked Lilly has not broken it.  I really like Lake Placid because it is a beautiful course and that was my first half marathon.  I have run that three times.  I hated Scroon Lake because of the hills and it was so hot.  I love the Gettysburg Half because I liked winning a baked pie and I helped the north win ha ha ha.  I won a beer mug for that (which my stupid ex also has).  I think I am more pissed about that than him dumping me in a text message.  Give me back my race mugs you stupid f-er!!!!!!!!!!  Sorry ha ha ha .  I want them back.


Favorite race:  The Boston Half Marathon.  Why?  I got to run with Kim Smith from New Zealand.  I did meet Joan Benoit Samuelson at the Wineglass Half and she did run with me but the Boston Half had a lot of pros in it and for about an hour and a half I got to live the dream of competitive running.  I was even happy when I realized they were only two miles ahead of me ha ha ha.  Those girls are fast.  I can’t remember who the other girl was.  Jepto???  She was from Ethiopia.  Crazy fast!!!!!


Favorite Marathon:  Gettysburg Full….ha ha ha ha it is the only full I have done and I did it twice.  My side won both times.  Do not even ask where my mugs are.  B–p!!!!!  I was going to do the full Wineglass Marathon but I was extremely sick and I went out for my last run and had to stop and barf and did not even make it three miles.  It figures.  I was so excited so we have a redo this year!!!!!!!!  No sicky for me!


     So I am excited about these races.  I have a lot of procrastinating going on.  I should be doing 48 report cards and getting ready for the week, but I am so excited about this racing season. 

     I do not know what it is.  Maybe it is the will to succeed or maybe it is the tight ass shorts that I wear to help me run better, which works.  I feel really amazing and sexy when I run.  I do not want to sound cocky, but there is just something about being out there for that time and feeling the wind brush against me.  I love the feel of a good run and a hard workout.  There is nothing better than to pass the guys and earn a little respect for not being a slow runner.  There is no such thing as slow unless you are on the couch like I am right now.  My point is, I am proud of my accomplishments and for the first time in a long time, I feel pretty fucking good!!!!  I hope I feel that way on the bike too, but the helmet does not make me feel sexy.  I have enjoyed being single these past 6 months, but I am hoping that my positive attitude and warm heart catches someone’s attention.  I think I am a good person and I have a deep sense of value and the ability to be genuine.


     It has been almost two years since I left my lovely ex husband.  I am proud that today I feel like I have my new, fresh start.  I am excited of some news I received today.  I hate that I still have to share Lilly, but for once things are going well.  I hope life keeps looking up.  Right now, I feel unstoppable!


You Run Like A Girl

“You throw like a girl.”

I get really pissed when I hear that…okay I agree…boys are better at some things but girls can be good too.  My first win in running, I was ahead of everyone but one guy.  It makes me more competitive and I have more fun.  So I am looking at this race next weekend and the winner finished in 5:08….my mile time is 5:22….and I want this sooooooo bad! I realistically do not think I can do this so I am probably talking out my ass, but I would love more than anything to beat all the guys.  In any case, the girl who won last year finished in 8:07….I want to win an airplane trophy…does that make me a kid? So what!   I think Lilly would love to play with it.   


Therefore, I should probably go for a run!   Image

Confession Friday- From the Couch

ImageIt is finally Friday again but I cannot complain.  I think this week went by rather fast though I am sad I have to give up Lilly on Monday already and it seems to fly by fast.  I am still not happy that I will not see her for about two weeks in April…It sucks!


     So confession Friday.  Hmmm…Okay so I wanted to run by Sullivan Park today and I was with Lilly.  It started to rain, but we still played anyways.  We love playgrounds in the summer…it may never get here though.  Well, when we finished playing I confess I almost drove to Sylvan Beach in Vernon, NY.  It isn’t that far but it is a hike.  I wanted cotton candy.  I do not know why but I have been craving it.  I am trying to drop weight and I forgot my lunch today.  I have been eating pumpkin ravioli.  It is so good, but I did not bring it today.  I was starving and I did not have enough time to go out at lunch.  I craved cotton candy.  I am proud that I resisted the urge and did not give in. 


     I am happy that I had a good run on Tuesday this week, but I want to run way more.  I feel like I get a little lazy.  I do have a treadmill so the rain is no excuse and Lilly sometimes cooperates when I am running…sometimes is the key word.  I can tell when I have not run much because this weather starts to depress me.  I love running and being inside all day sucks.  I wish I could run and play outside all day.  It would be wonderful.


ImageThis is how I felt yesterday…and I am only 33!!!!!!!!!!!


Pretty soon, Lilly is going to be driving me around!!! I am going to be too old and cripple to drive myself.

ImageSo what to confess that is really interesting.  I have no idea.

I found the picture of my worst bib number.  I was at the WDF (Not What Da Fuck)…rather Woman’s Distance Festival in Deruyter.  My friend Katie came with me and I took one for the team.  I took the infamous number 69.  I didn’t care and yes I did have some laughs along the way…so here it is:

ImageSee not very exciting.  I did okay in this race…I finished in 23 something but it was hot as hell out because it was night time.  Blaaaaaaaaaaa


So I started out on this whole mission this year.  I love the blogging and the running.  I remember the weekend I had to go to Chambersburg. I was having bad luck with my car too.  I had a low tire pressure twice on my car.Image

I was going to run the Tipp Hill Shamrock Run in Syracuse and even registered….but I decided I needed to flee town and get away from my race creeps…so I guess this could be the confession for Friday and I do not care if he is listening or not…it was just plain weird.  I cannot block the person because my blog is public. After I got dumped by the VP of the douche of the month club, I did not run for a while.  I forced myself to do a half marathon in Pennsylvania and thought I was going to die.  I needed to get back into running and it was getting dark out so stupid me I thought this guy would actually be okay with just running with me.  So we went running and it was fine.  Then his date bailed on him for some rugby formal.  I said I would go and I went and got completely hammered.  That was the last time I was drunk. Drunk makes me stupid.  Even before we went to the formal as FRIENDS, since I made it clear I was not ready to date, he made up this schedule.  He asked when I had Lilly since I said I was not going to run on those days.  The next thing I know I get a schedule of all the days we are running all the way to July.  Then, he wants to take me on a date.  Instead of taking me on a date to the movies or something he takes me to Ohio to a music concert and gets a hotel.  I don’t know about you but when you take someone on a date for the first time to a hotel, it is degrading…especially when the person gets into the room and lays on the bed.  After this happened, I was done.  When I got picked for the Five Dates In Five Days contest, he sent me pissy texts because I did not want to date him and why was I doing this.  I told him he was a dick and I blocked him.  Then on Valentine’s Day he tried to contact me and I told him to leave me alone.  He is at so many races and I just do not want to be around that.  When I ran the Syracuse Half Marathon he was there and shouted out my name going up the hill.  It made me stop for a little while and want to barf in my mouth.  I think I was repulsed and he raised the red flags…


     Moving on, I still am not sure about Maine.  I think I am leaning towards going and riding before I leave for Maine.  Maybe I will bring the bike to Maine.  I have never biked there.  We will see….


     As for life in general, I miss biking and running this week.  I feel jipped because of this weather and my work schedule.  I cannot wait to go back to 4:05 next year when I can leave work.  That still gives me some time to go running before I get Lilly.  I think I will love this!!!! 


So next weekend I have a one mile race, along with two half marathons.  Now that I have the half marathons under my belt and somewhat in control if I watch my steps, I want to do well on the one mile race.  I like the trophies and I think I am a better sprinter.  Have a good Friday.


Ohhhhh I need new shoes and my pure connects are not working out…what lightweight shoes can you recommend????

Of Maine and bike

I could not tell you if I loved you the first moment I saw you, or if it was the second or third or fourth. But I remember the first moment I looked at you walking toward me and realized that somehow the rest of the world seemed to vanish when I was with you.
Cassandra Clare

I was all set to go to Maine for a double race on Saturday. I contemplated and made my decision. Then I changed my mind and then I changed it again. I am very torn. That quote about love, besides the fact that my bike can’t walk, this is how I want to feel about biking.

But I am still frustrated. I still do not know all my gears very well, I am nervous about clipping and I am going to be honest now: if I had a flat tire I might be able to fix it but I wouldn’t be able to get the back wheel on the bike. I think I must sound rather pathetic!!! I need to learn my bike and I’m now down to less than a month before my duathlon in Rochester!!!!!!!!! All I can think and excuse the language is fuck I am screwed. If I could get my shit together I actually have a shot at doing well.

This race is not one of my goals I had set out to accomplish but I am I think really looking forward to this one the most.

So I can’t decide if I should spend the time riding or drive to Maine. I have no idea and I have about a week left before I would be going….help!!!!!

To go to Maine or to bike…. And I have done races in Maine fyiimage

“Run like you stole something”


I have been on this whole kick to fall back in love with myself and it is working. I went for a run last night on the hills. I decided to reverse my course and just go out and have a good time. I decided to go with the theory, “run like you stole something.” It worked. I ran under six minutes for my first mile. It has been done and sure it was downhill but it was still fast. I had cars beeping when I went up the giant hill so they either were cheering me on because that hill sucks of I had the “honk if you are horny” sign on me….it is always guys who honk…just saying….

I hope I don’t lose this positive feeling I have. Running is the best therapy and it is free…besides the race entries and shoes. I don’t know where I would be without it except three hundred pounds and a giant Oreo ass. Running is my “me” time and you know you are truly in love with running when it never makes you quit.

I am also proud to report the kids have taken it easy on me after last week…I have some good black and blues from Friday. I am too old to be a punching bag. My leg looks a lot better but this is where he was kicking me.

I want to sneak out and run during my planning….but I need to go slow and change so I don’t know if it will happen. This weather sucks. I need some outside time. The air felt nice though I think the hills were a bit much…but today pretend you stole something when you run…it is a lot better than pretending you are being chased by someone who is going to kidnap you or something…someone told me to try that and I find it just plain creepy.

Syracuse Half Marathon #36

A Twin Thing

ImageImageImage“Listen to your body.  Do not be a blind and deaf tenant.” George Sheehan…


     Today was my 36th half marathon, as well as the 4th half marathon of the month.  I did it.  I am still in shock that I made it past this half marathon.  Each and every time I run, I am amazed at what I am capable of.  I am not sad I am not as fast, but I am working harder and putting my heart into my running.  I start my playlist off with Breathe Carolina and I know the song order.  I know how much time I have until I run out of music.  I really like the songs at the end, but I am not disappointed when I finish before they play.  I set the music so it plays in a certain order and usually miles 8-10 are like a fish yanking on a…

View original post 1,709 more words

Sleepy Hollow Half Marathon- #35

Today was my first half marathon of the weekend…and it went into the books with a bang!  A big fat, bang in my knee…I can’t believe I did the fall of shame today.  There is even a picture of me doing the walk of shame at the end of the race when I did not think I could walk anymore.  I think the only thing that made me get to the finish was the funny Scottish guy who said in a thick accent, “come on now ya hear.  Knees are so over-rated anyways and you’ve got about a mile.”  He was funny.  I picked up myself and finished.
The day started out alright and I made it to Tarrytown with no problem.  I keep leaving all this extra time to get to races and then I sat in my car for about an hour after packet pick up.  I like getting there early because I am sure it helps and I can just relax.  I met some nice people.  I saw a lot of  “Half Fanatics.”  There was even a guy from Kansas City.  I have never met someone from there.
By the way, I do indeed notice I look like a sharpei on my stomach but I was so sore I don’t really care…
So I love the medal and it is perhaps one of my favorites.  I think it is really “tight.”
The elevation on this course was ridiculous.  It was like a roller coaster.  I am proud that I had a great pace until mile 8…that is when I decided to kiss the dirt.  Maybe when I was listening to the song, “Another One Bites The Dust,” I was a little too inspired. 
The truth is that it was uphill and a trail.  The trail was gravel and I tried to sprint up it and boom!!!!!!  At least the guy behind me asked if I was alright.  I was embarrassed.  Ha ha and then I think because I had the wind knocked out of me I was sort of hyperventilating.  Now I think I know what an asthma attack must feel like. 
In short, I had a great time.  I confess I felt so sore at the end that it was a little hard to suck it up and not want to cry.  I am nervous about Syracuse tomorrow.  I wanted to do so good today.  I feel like I am having some great luck and I do not want to lose it.  I consider my luck still strong.  I am amazed and proud that I still finished in under two hours even though I had to walk for a mile.  I was a little sad to realize it would not be possible to finish in the 1:40’s for the time…but finish in under two hours after my spill meant that I was strong and did not give up. 
This would have been one of those amazing moments where Prince Charming would have carried me to the car and let me put ice on my knees…but as luck would have it, the Phelps Memorial Hospital was at the race.  I think destiny wanted me to meet the crew.  I had to have the gravel pulled out of my knees and they put hydrogen peroxide on my knees…that felt great!!!!!  They washed off my hands and I realized I had a bloody nose in the car and massive amounts of dirt on my face…
This was still a great race.  It is not for the weak and it is making me reconsider signing up for the Mountain Goat in Syracuse on May 4, 2014.  Love me some hills!!!!
Great volunteers and good music around the course.  I liked the amount of support on the course.  The roads were in rough shape and obviously the trail was bad.  They rerouted the course because of the snow.  I feel like part of the race was on a highway…117???  That was fun…I am also sad to report, though it seemed appropriate, that I left my purple ems headband on the side of the road.  I wore that in my first race…rip headband.  Jeez!!!  That and my black running gloves!!!!!  I am glad I resisted the urge to throw my mountain goat shirt.  I love my mountain goat shirt that is hot pink!  I don’t want to lose that.  So today I finished in about 1:58…maybe a little less and my garmin said I ran 13.5 miles…and strava don’t preach.

And at the end of the day and even during the race, I am still smiling.