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Weekend Detour

It would not be at all strange if history came to the conclusion that the perfection of the bicycle was the greatest incident of the nineteenth century. ~Author Unknown

 

    
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This weekend was far from going as planned.   On Wednesday, I booked a hotel in New Jersey so that I could run the 1/2 Sauer 1/2 Kraut in Philadelphia at the Pennypack Park. After finishing my race, I would then drive to the Creek Campgrounds in Rosaline, NY.  I would camp overnight and go to the half marathon in New Paltz, NY.  It was a trail half marathon.  It sounded like the perfect weekend for a girl with a lot of hopes and passion for running.  That girl is me, but I wasn’t myself this weekend.  It happens in life and sometimes you just have to stop, breathe, and take the detour.  It was not easy, but I had to do it.  Do I have any regrets?  Sure I wish I could have gone to those amazing places, but it just was not meant to be this weekend.  Maybe if it is in the cards, I can go next year.  I have missed races, but I have never missed two in a row.  I am sure you are wondering why I would throw all of my plans out the window and just stay home.  I wish it were as simple as a minor cold…but it isn’t. 

 

     I am trying to find a way to sum this up without bringing too much drama.  I am not perfect and I am not the best with communication.  I think that my ex husband ruined it a little for me.  I got to the point where I cannot take the yelling.  I start to shake and hyperventilate.  It is scary.  I do not know how to deal with it.  I went to see someone about it before and I had to work on my breathing.  I am not ashamed of it.  If you are with someone who yells and swears and makes you feel so low in life, it is hard to move on and hear the loud noises.  I think that is why I seem to do well at work because I do not yell and I can get the children to listen to me.  That is not easy in first grade.

 

     I have a student teacher and I have had one the past three years.  I am not a person who likes to lead and I try to be laid back and do the best job I can.  I do not know if my student teacher was unhappy.  I do not know all of the details.  I just know that I had some trouble finding her and she was going to get observed on Wednesday so I had to help her out.  She was going to be teaching content and her small ESL group.  I was excited for her to get done with her two observations and move along.  She is done this coming Thursday.  She wanted to teach content and the other teacher did not want her to because of SLOs.  My student teacher talked her into it.  I thought she was going to be with the student teacher and I was supposed to watch the other teacher’s class.  Everything was fine.  I was with the kids watching a movie and my student teacher was in the room teaching content.  Another teacher stuck his head in and didn’t say anything.  Come to find out my student teacher was alone and I misunderstood.  The teacher had taken some kids to do SLOs and my student teacher was teaching and I didn’t think this was a bad thing.  She is getting her graduate degree and is a certified teacher already.  She is also a substitute in the district and has been at some pretty bad schools.  In a way, I was proud of her for taking on this role.  I guess the one teacher yelled at the other teacher for leaving her alone.  I felt bad about the whole situation and it really was a misunderstanding.

 

My student teacher was not happy because the kids were terrible.  I told her I wish that she would have let me know or the other teacher.  I apologized because this really was just a mix up but I was just in the next room.  She should have brought the kids or sent someone with a note.  I was a little mad at the other teacher, but I could see what she was doing and slos are very important.  I decided to talk to the teacher after school and we had a good talk.  We wanted to talk to the student teacher and just make sure if she ever has a problem she comes to us about it.  We are here to help her and help her succeed. 

 

I gave her supervisor a heads up that we just wanted to talk to her to make sure she knows she can come to me and that I am here to help her.  She accused the teacher of attacking her and I did not think that was fair.  My co teacher can be a little uptight, but she is a great gale and she meant well.  My student teacher was upset.  Later, I went to the ESL room and she must have told them or they were psychic because the teachers knew we had talked to her.  At first they did not say anything.  Then the one girl started saying I was horrible and she is sad because I am giving this girl a horrible student teaching experience.  I should not have had this meeting with her because she was getting observed.  I felt like a pile of shit.  If you knew me, you would know I was just reaching out to the poor girl to make sure she was alright and that she had a good experience.  I was not out to sabotage her or make her feel horrible.  I even told her she could come in late in the morning as long as she had her work done.  The other girl didn’t say much just that the timing could have been better.  I agree.  I know that my co teacher was persistent about talking to her.  I confessed that I did not want a student teacher because of the time of year.  So the girl asked why I had one then.  It is hard to find placements and it was so hard one teacher has two student teachers.  It is not easy.  I have so much testing from April until June that it is a circus.  The kids are also excited and ready for summer.  I feel bad for the student teacher.  It isn’t that I do not want one.  In fact, I do not get anything for it.  I do not think people realize that.  I had a bunch of practicum students this year too and was trying to convince them all to become ESL teachers.

 

Moving on, I had another talk with my student teacher and told her that I was sorry she felt this way.  I think she was more afraid of the other teacher.  The ESL teacher said she wished that I would have protected her from the teacher.  I guess I did not see her as threatening but maybe because I have known her she didn’t see the same person.  My co teacher has helped me a lot this year and she has a tough class.  She was also my student teacher last year and I helped get her a job.  I promise I try to be a good person.

 

I thought this was all water under the bridge.  I wanted to move on.  We had only eleven days left of school.  We were going to the zoo the next day and we were all excited.  The girls even had their parents and siblings coming in to help with the trip.

 

At about 9:30 I got a text saying that we were having a meeting and that I needed to be there.  I asked what it was about and they did not say.  I assumed the zoo but I have a confession.  I have this most bizarre intuition that tells me things.  I was feeling it.  Every inch of me felt like I should not go to this meeting.  I did not want to skip the meeting, but I just had that feeling.  I inquired about it and wanted to know.  No one knew.  I invited the teacher from upstairs because she is part of first grade too.  Iwanted to belate in every way but I was there on time.  My body was nervous.  I was fidgeting when I walked into the room with the teachers.  There were two ESL teachers, all of grade one and myself…well there was one teacher missing because she was late. 

 

The male teacher said he would get to the zoo, but first a few things.  I just knew it.  He ripped into my co teacher and me about the student teacher.  We both told him we talked about it already and we put it behind us.  That this happened yesterday and we apologized to the girl and I told the supervisor.  The supervisor was happy she was alone because she is already going to be teaching fourth grade and she needs the experience of being left alone…no matter what.  The male teacher said we should have known better…etc…that if something were to have happened….I thought my co teacher did a great job of handling it.  He tried to talk about the other co teacher but she had nothing to do with it.  The ESL teacher just mentioned that the timing could have been better and we again apologized.  Everything was honestly bad timing. 

 

The teacher said he felt left out all year.  He talked about the 93q event where they came and read.  I felt bad because I was only supposed to pick one class.  I talked my principal into two…again, I won’t have them come in and read if I know it is a big problem but this happened in October.  Then he went on to talk about me servicing his kids and being late.  I tried to tell him that I have hall duty until 9 and sometimes I have to go to the bathroom or stop by my room.  Then it is 9:05.  He is right.  He tried saying I leave at 9:30 but I promise that is only if I need to go to the bathroom or to the other girl’s class.  The truth is he is a good teacher and he is fine on his own and his ESL students are amazing and so smart.  I just support and hand out papers.  Honestly, I feel like I co teach more in the one teacher’s classroom out of all of them.  It is hard to be in so many rooms.  I felt bad though because I had actually talked to the reading teacher before the meeting about how I had so much testing it felt like I was never in his room.  He went on to badger me but no one defended me.  I helped out the girls when they were observed.  I helped them out with so much, especially the girl who had been my student teacher.  It was interesting that he felt left out because I did too.  I had an argument with the one girl earlier about how when I was testing no one told me about the Easter Egg Hunt.  I am in my room doing paper work sometimes or getting ready for the testing.  No one told me.  Also, I have subbed a lot this year and helped out.  I just wish he hadn’t said that if we went to administration things would get ugly.  That is not what I want to happen because I actually liked working with this person.  Perhaps the worst thing I did was to say I could not take it and walk out of the room crying. 

 

I could not come back.  I had the worst headache and I felt bad all around.  I felt bad he yelled at the girls and me.  I felt bad for him for feeling left out.  I felt bad because no one stuck up for me. It gets worse.  I could not go on the field trip because I was too upset.  I am not strong sometimes.  I get a text saying conversations need to be had and I need to listen to what these girls have to say.  I need to talk to the girls and Jesus.  I do not understand.  It is like I feel attacked.  Not only do I feel attacked but I feel defensive because I too will have to bring up stuff that bothers me.  I will have to mention that there are things that did not go well for me.  I do not want to do that and why is this all being lashed out at the end of the school year?  The funny thing is I could just leave it all and move on because I want to and have already asked to go up to third grade.  I do not know why I just leave it and move on but I felt like these were my girls and I am afraid to ask what is wrong.  I am hoping that it is the feeling that if I have a problem I just need to confront them.  I need to tell them but I am not someone who wants to cause drama. 

 

So I am faced with this and could use your help.  I did not want to involve administration but I cannot take yelling.  If there is an administrator there then nothing gets twisted.  She is the neutral party.  She only got involved because she heard me crying.  This school is my home and I want to stay.  I love teaching there and hope that these people realize I am a good person.  So I am having a meeting with the male teacher and administration because I cannot take the yelling.  I know he will not be happy but I am hoping he hears what I have to say and realizes I actually liked working with him and felt left out too.  I am meeting with administration and the two ESL teachers to clear up the student teacher situation once and for all and tell them that my co teacher is not as scary as people make her out to be.  Here is what I need help with.  The two co teachers want to meet without administration.  I did not want to do this because I want to not be attacked and I want to have a good rest of the school year.  Like I said, I am hoping it is about communication and they will not lash out at me but I am wondering if meeting with two girls alone is a good idea?  They promised they would not be mean and still want to be my friend and don’t hate me…but I do not know if I can take this….

 

I was beyond depressed this weekend.  I had to miss work Friday and just be by myself…safe.  I also had the worst migraine from the yelling and crying.  I was so sick.  I know hiding is not the best way to solve problems in life and I need to work on it.  I am a very, extremely sensitive person and perhaps that is why I am single.  I have felt lonely most of my life and I am not good with loud voices and do not think a man should yell at a woman.  I am so old fashioned.  I try to live by example and want everyone to get along.  I am such a sucker.  I want to believe I can make it through these last nine days of work in one piece and that life will go on and they will not hate me.  I should not care so much what they think but I try to be a good person in life.

 

So I went to the store and got my new bike.  I needed it and I decided it was time to take a detour.  I did not think I cared much for driving to Philly and doing a half marathon when I just bought a new road bike.  I took it for a nice ride on Saturday. 
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I went 31 miles and it was wonderful.  I have to admit my shoulder hurt and my foot went numb.  I have to have that fixed. 
specialbike2Then I was going to go to New Paltz for Sunday and camp.  I decided to detour that.  I made grilled cheese and tomato soup.  I watched North and South, which is a completely depressing and happy movie in Britain.  I loved it and then I went to bed.  I considered running an 8k but I decided to sleep in and just be refreshed. 

 

Today, I went to my relative’s house in Oneida and went for a 40 mile bike ride.  I went to Munnsville, where there is a cemetery hidden for our family.  My dad’s side had lived there since the 1700’s.  On a side note a teacher I used to work with, her ancestor was my ancestor’s neighbor.  Small world isn’t it?  Then I went to Morrisville.  My mom worked there for 11 years with my dad’s cousin and relative.  They set my parents up on a blind date at the Captains Lounge or Quarters..Don’t remember the last name.  My dad proposed two weeks later and they have been married for 36 years.  Crazy stuff…It is Father’s Day so I figured I would live down his memory lane a little bit and then I called him to tell him about it.  He thought I was nuts for biking to Morrisville because of the crazy hill there. 

 

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On my way home, I decided to get lost in one of my favorite places.  I love the Erie Canal and it is nice to go to it in Chittenango because no one goes there.  I saw a lot of people on horses and wanted to share a picture, but did not want to spook the horses.  I also saw a lot of huge fish.  The one fish was so big it jumped out of the water and tried to get a fly.  I thought it was the size of a salmon.  I wonder what kind of fish are in there besides sunfish and trout.  Any idea? 
specialrun I saw young couples, boys fishing, people whispering, a person walking a dog.  I love the canal.  It makes me forget about work and often wonder if I need to do something else in life. I am tired of being normal. I want to be different and do something where I make a difference. I do not feel like I do at work, except to the kids. It is nice to see so many people enjoying the outdoors. 

 

What is your ideal date or what was the best date you ever went on?

 

IF I could spend time with a guy, I would love to go for a walk along the canal.  I know I talk a lot but not there.  It is my solitude…my serenity.  I would love to just get lost there and then sit under the stars and listen to the animals at night.  It sounds absolutely perfect.  I think I will think about this tomorrow. 

 

 

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Greater Binghamton Bridge Run Half Marathon- In the books!!!! #9/41

“Running has never failed to give me great end results, and that’s why I keep coming back for more!”

ImageIf you told me I would finish this race yesterday, I would not have believed you.  I can honestly say that this has been a great challenge so far in my quest for at least 18 half marathons (and I am running 2 full marathons since I botched last years New Year’s Resolution).  Well, I was sick, but still I could have signed up for another one.  I knew this would be hard, but it is a constant battle every step of the way to get lost in the music and the excitement and forget about the miles put in.  Every step, every mile, every start, and every finish has made me proud of the person I am becoming along the way. 

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Today was so much fun, though I almost had to drop out. The course was not very hilly and the bridges were fun to run over and under.  I liked the volunteers and the water stops were great.  I think that the police did a great job with the traffic.  I also liked that the volunteers were spread out so you did not run into anyone else running.  I loved the signs.  My favorite two were, “smile if you peed a little,” and “worst parade ever.”  I always love, “run like you stole something.”   I think spectators do a great job at making us smile and bringing humorous signs…and I do feel like Bessie the cow when I hear that bell. 

      I told you my shoes are highly worn out.  I have over 600 miles on them.  So today started off good, but by mile five, my foot was killing me.  I felt like someone was grabbing onto the back of my foot and putting a needle in it.  I think it is my Achilles tendon, but that has never bothered me before so I cannot be certain.  I do not know which is worse: Achilles tendon or stress fracture??  I will take none of the above final answer.

 

ImageMY shoessssss have to go into the garbage but I can’t do it…someone is going to have to do it for me.  These shoes have been in more than twelve half marathons and a bunch of other races…they are sentimental.

 

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The orange shirt I had on in the first picture was from today’s race.  I heard it was bad luck to wear the shirt while running the race.  What do you think?  I like the shirt because it is bright so I can wear it at night and it is a tech shirt.  This race gets major bonus points though because they gave me an extra small!!!!!!!  So I do not have to wear it as pajamas.  If I ever have a serious relationship, I am going to have to do some serious pajama shopping because I do not currently own any pajamas.  I confess I wear race shirts all the time ha ha ha…hardcore or pathetic lol?

 

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Halfway…last year I counted and I ran 9 half marathons the whole year.  I ran some 5ks and two 10ks.  This is my bling from my goal so far (but the plaque with the goat is not part of it).  I do not know what I won from the Flannery’s Pub Half Marathon yet.  I was second in my age group.  I noticed that it is funny how I love the half marathon but I do better in the shorter races.  I was 3rd overall in the trout 5k and 2nd overall in the one mile.  I am proud, but I love the half marathon even though I am not as strong as I used to be.  My best half finish is 1:37 minutes and my best place finish is 1:40 at the Run to the Sun Half Marathon.  I was third.  I like third place, though I have won 4 races…all when I was 31…I think…now I am slow ha ha. 

 

I still cannot believe I am halfway.  I am a little sad but I have some tough races coming up and I am scared of the Marine Corps Half Marathon because I heard a lot of talk about Hospital Hill???  I heard it is scary and what is it with giant hills at mile ten???  Yikes!  I had a lot of fun today and I hope to keep running as I get older and maybe Lilly will run too!!! 

 

I watched this video about a girl who danced over the finish line.  Today, I wanted to be that girl who smiled and who really showed how much running can be fun!  Running really is a great sport and it is good physically and mentally.  I did a split in the air at mile 12 and do not know if the photographer got the whole thing but he laughed and said, “do not fall now!!!”  The people were clapping ha ha ha so it made my day.  Then at the finish line, which was downhill, I threw my hands up in the air and shouted, “wooooo hoooooooo!”  I then did the long jump over the finish line because there was a lot of space and not enough time to dance.  I didn’t even care what my time was and maybe if I hadn’t done the split I would have broke 1:50 this race, but I did not care.  I have already done that.  Today was about the fun.  It was about not listening to that voice that wants to quit.  It was about showing people what running does to someone…and it was all about bringing in the finish for my 9th half this year and my 41st half marathon ever!!!!!!! 

 

I found the best recipe to share with my friends today!!!!!!!!!!   You will love this and I want to make it now!

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ImagePeanut Butter Protein Bars….yummmmmmmmmmmy!

They are gluten free and no bake too!

 

Sooooooo 41 half marathons and 9 this year…in less than two months, here is my quote of the day:

“Between you and every goal that you wish to achieve, there is a series of obstacles, and the bigger the goal, the bigger the obstacles. Your decision to be, have and do something out of the ordinary entails facing difficulties and challenges that are out of the ordinary as well. Sometimes your greatest asset is simply your ability to stay with it longer than anyone else.”

~ Brian Tracy

 

 

I am a girl who could not run more than two miles by the time I was 26 and now look at me!  Never give up and never feel that something is impossible!!!!!!!!  If you are determined to succeed, nothing and I mean nothing, can get in your way!  Happy Sunday…

 

 

 

Greater Binghamton Bridge Run Half Marathon- #9- And Number 41

“People think I’m crazy to put myself through such torture, though I would argue otherwise. Somewhere along the line we seem to have confused comfort with happiness. Dostoyevsky had it right: ‘Suffering is the sole origin of consciousness.’ Never are my senses more engaged than when the pain sets in. There is a magic in misery. Just ask any runner.”
― Dean Karnazes, Ultramarathon Man: Confessions of an All-Night Runner

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I am not 100% sure what I am running this weekend but I think it is going to be the Binghamton Bridge Run. There is a big race in Syracuse but I have done the Mountain Goat four times and the 3k for it two times. I need a change. This race is at 7:30 so I will be done and still have my day. It sounds great!

I do not have a race for Saturday but if it doesn’t rain, I want to go out on my bike and get lost in the adirondacks…I am hoping to bike there but there is no cell service. I just hope if I do that then I will not get a flat. I am better at changing a flat, but I do not put enough air in it and that is a long ride!!!!!! Anyhow to be continued.
Here is the information for the race this weekend on Sunday if you are interested:

211 Henry Street, Binghamton 13901

Race Weekend Info
Saturday, May 3, 2014: Race Expo & Packet Pick-Up

Location: Metrocenter, 49 Court Street, Binghamton, NY 13901
Time: 10:00 a.m – 4:00 p.m.

•We Strongly encourage going to Packet Pick-Up to alleviate lines on race day.
•You MUST have your photo ID to get your packet. You CAN pick up someone else’s packet WITH a copy of THEIR PHOTO ID.

Sunday, May 4, 2014: Race Day sponsored by GHS Federal Credit Union and the Binghamton Mets

Location: NYSEG Stadium
Time: 6:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m.
Schedule:

•6:00 a.m. –
Race Day Packet Pick-Up Opens for Half Marathon
•7:30 a.m. –
National Anthem and Half Marathon Start

•8:00 a.m. –
Race Day Packet Pick-Up Opens for 5K
•10:00 a.m. –
National Anthem & 5K Race Start
•11:00 a.m. –
Course Closes for both races
•11:00 a.m. –
The Cool Down begins

I feel strange not having set plans this weekend….I think it is the first time this has happened in a while…seems weird and my feet like it but my heart wants to run. I need that rush!!!!!!!

This Weather Sucks

“When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope hardly seems worth having, just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road, without thought on anything but the ride you are taking.”

~Arthur Conan Doyle

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This will never ever ever be me!!!!!
I wanted to bike so bad today it was all I could think about…but I am starting to think that Mondays are rainforest days. I get all excited and it is so nice during the day, but then I get out of work and boom…it is raining. I stayed a little late at work so I am sort of hitting myself for not getting on the bike but after being out last week I had to catch up on some work and with my friends.

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Last year I biked into the Adirondack Park. This year I have some crazy goals. I would love to be able to bike into the Adirondack Park and camp for the night. My other crazy idea is to bike to a different state. Maybe I would go to Vermont. I do not know. This weather is a downer though. After being sick all last week and the rain today, I feel like I am definitely one of those has been runners and bikers. It is depressing.

So this weekend starts my big quest of five weekends in a row of racing. You might wondering how and why I am pulling this off.

Good Question!!!!!

Us teachers get this thing called Spring break!!!!!!!! I go on break this week and I am sort of sad to have missed out on the 5 half marathons in 5 days in 5 states…but maybe another year it will work out. I hope my friends are having fun. So this weekend I am hopefully not going to die in the Mercersburg Half Marathon. Then the weekend of the 26th, I have the duathlon if it isn’t snowing ha ha haha…and then I have the Flower City half marathon the day after. Since I share vacations with my ex husband when it comes to Lilly, I do not have her the following weekend. I will be doing The Binghamton Bridge half marathon. The weekend of May 11, there is a 5k I am going to do for my sister. She went to school with a girl who was murdered so this race is in memory of her. I am glad it is a 5k. The following weekend I will have two half marathons. I am really excited about that weekend. I will get to do the St. Michael’s Half Marathon and that is supposed to be really fast. Then on Sunday I cannot wait for the Marine Corps Half Marathon. I know this will be a little teaser to the Marine Corps Full Marathon. I also put my name into the lottery for the Paris Half Marathon.

I took 14 years of French and I lived in France in college. I would love to run a marathon there and go see London!!!! I hope I get in and maybe to the London Marathon….cannot wait!

Feeling bla….so so sick of this weather.

Confession Friday- Lost On The Map

“Love isn’t something you find. Love is something that finds you.”

Loretta Young

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I feel like I have been lost this week. I have been out of work for four days. I took Lilly to Pratt’s Falls yesterday and sat on the bench while she played. I felt bad because I guess I did not realize there is no playground but we had fun.
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She thought she was fishing and I did not have the heart to spoil her make believe adventure. I was even astonished when she thought she had caught a fish. It turns out there was a dead fish in the water. I said, “good job! Please do not pick it up!”

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I have been thinking a lot about the marathon this week since I have had some health issues. I want to run Boston, but if I never do, at least I cannot say I didn’t try. I cannot say I gave up. I think that a marathon is a battle to find out what guts you really have. I need to tell the marathon to shove it! I also need to train better. I need to do more cross training and have more good miles than crap miles. I am hoping things work out. We will see….

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This is my dog Indy…well he was more my brother’s dog but I loved walking with him. I miss running with dogs and I think it actually helped. The dog was happy and I was…except when the dog had to stop 80 times to go to the bathroom or saw that fuzzy rabbit it wanted. I would love to run with a dog but I travel too much to have my own right now….so if anyone wants to loan me a dog I promise to tire it out!!!!!

Confession??? I found out at the doctor’s office that I gained weight…This will not do!!!!! I have been eating so healthy and running so much that I am annoyed instead of dropping weight I gained a 5 pound piece of ham on my ass!!!!!!! Whattttttt the heck. My goal weight is 112 for running purposes, which means I now have to lose 10 pounds instead of 5…I am just agitated. I am not fat by any means but I want to run fast…now wonder I have felt slow. So confession??? Today I was making Lilly’s birthday cake and I decided to sample the frosting…it was amazing. I miss these sort of goodies…I also cheated and had Ben and Jerry’s….I was going to go all vegan and that was the best ice cream ever. I think that once you give up something for a long time, you really appreciate how awesome it tastes. On that note, I need to stop thinking about it and start working out.

Oh, the doctor’s office called and as long as I continue to feel better I can go back to work on Monday, which means mooooorrrrrreeeeeee running and biking!!!!!!!!

It is going to be nice, though I saw some very cold temperatures on Tuesday. I think it is supposed to be 77 Monday and only 39 Tuesday. Hey, I live in Central New York. I think we have no vitamin d in our systems because the sun is only out three days a year.

Other confessions????? Hmmmmm besides the usual BS I always want…can’t think of anything else new but I am proud to say being at home all week I did not go insane and I did not once start talking to myself. I even took the time to use some baby wipes and clean the bike. It felt so nice to touch the bike…I need to actually ride it though.

Goals???? Okay I really want to ride or run with someone. I get bored being alone all the time. I think I paid my dues this week….I will even wear matching or cute outfits ha ha ha…..oh boy I need to get out of this house.
And my quote choice, I have to just be myself and enjoy life and I hope love does find me along the way…

Confession Friday- From the Couch

ImageIt is finally Friday again but I cannot complain.  I think this week went by rather fast though I am sad I have to give up Lilly on Monday already and it seems to fly by fast.  I am still not happy that I will not see her for about two weeks in April…It sucks!

 

     So confession Friday.  Hmmm…Okay so I wanted to run by Sullivan Park today and I was with Lilly.  It started to rain, but we still played anyways.  We love playgrounds in the summer…it may never get here though.  Well, when we finished playing I confess I almost drove to Sylvan Beach in Vernon, NY.  It isn’t that far but it is a hike.  I wanted cotton candy.  I do not know why but I have been craving it.  I am trying to drop weight and I forgot my lunch today.  I have been eating pumpkin ravioli.  It is so good, but I did not bring it today.  I was starving and I did not have enough time to go out at lunch.  I craved cotton candy.  I am proud that I resisted the urge and did not give in. 

 

     I am happy that I had a good run on Tuesday this week, but I want to run way more.  I feel like I get a little lazy.  I do have a treadmill so the rain is no excuse and Lilly sometimes cooperates when I am running…sometimes is the key word.  I can tell when I have not run much because this weather starts to depress me.  I love running and being inside all day sucks.  I wish I could run and play outside all day.  It would be wonderful.

 

ImageThis is how I felt yesterday…and I am only 33!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Pretty soon, Lilly is going to be driving me around!!! I am going to be too old and cripple to drive myself.

ImageSo what to confess that is really interesting.  I have no idea.

I found the picture of my worst bib number.  I was at the WDF (Not What Da Fuck)…rather Woman’s Distance Festival in Deruyter.  My friend Katie came with me and I took one for the team.  I took the infamous number 69.  I didn’t care and yes I did have some laughs along the way…so here it is:

ImageSee not very exciting.  I did okay in this race…I finished in 23 something but it was hot as hell out because it was night time.  Blaaaaaaaaaaa

 

So I started out on this whole mission this year.  I love the blogging and the running.  I remember the weekend I had to go to Chambersburg. I was having bad luck with my car too.  I had a low tire pressure twice on my car.Image

I was going to run the Tipp Hill Shamrock Run in Syracuse and even registered….but I decided I needed to flee town and get away from my race creeps…so I guess this could be the confession for Friday and I do not care if he is listening or not…it was just plain weird.  I cannot block the person because my blog is public. After I got dumped by the VP of the douche of the month club, I did not run for a while.  I forced myself to do a half marathon in Pennsylvania and thought I was going to die.  I needed to get back into running and it was getting dark out so stupid me I thought this guy would actually be okay with just running with me.  So we went running and it was fine.  Then his date bailed on him for some rugby formal.  I said I would go and I went and got completely hammered.  That was the last time I was drunk. Drunk makes me stupid.  Even before we went to the formal as FRIENDS, since I made it clear I was not ready to date, he made up this schedule.  He asked when I had Lilly since I said I was not going to run on those days.  The next thing I know I get a schedule of all the days we are running all the way to July.  Then, he wants to take me on a date.  Instead of taking me on a date to the movies or something he takes me to Ohio to a music concert and gets a hotel.  I don’t know about you but when you take someone on a date for the first time to a hotel, it is degrading…especially when the person gets into the room and lays on the bed.  After this happened, I was done.  When I got picked for the Five Dates In Five Days contest, he sent me pissy texts because I did not want to date him and why was I doing this.  I told him he was a dick and I blocked him.  Then on Valentine’s Day he tried to contact me and I told him to leave me alone.  He is at so many races and I just do not want to be around that.  When I ran the Syracuse Half Marathon he was there and shouted out my name going up the hill.  It made me stop for a little while and want to barf in my mouth.  I think I was repulsed and he raised the red flags…

 

     Moving on, I still am not sure about Maine.  I think I am leaning towards going and riding before I leave for Maine.  Maybe I will bring the bike to Maine.  I have never biked there.  We will see….

 

     As for life in general, I miss biking and running this week.  I feel jipped because of this weather and my work schedule.  I cannot wait to go back to 4:05 next year when I can leave work.  That still gives me some time to go running before I get Lilly.  I think I will love this!!!! 

 

So next weekend I have a one mile race, along with two half marathons.  Now that I have the half marathons under my belt and somewhat in control if I watch my steps, I want to do well on the one mile race.  I like the trophies and I think I am a better sprinter.  Have a good Friday.

 

Ohhhhh I need new shoes and my pure connects are not working out…what lightweight shoes can you recommend????

Don’t Go Cryin’ To Your Momma Cause You’re On Your Own…

Image“I loved the freedom of running, the fresh air, and feeling that the only person I am competing with is me.” Wilma Rudolph

 

 

Confession Friday!!!!!!!!!

 

What a week!  I got to play with my craptastic bike that needs  a lot of work…I had a great time learning about it but I am annoyed I need a new one.  I had a good week at work aside from my moments of being a punching bag again…and I enjoyed the awesome starbucks my friend brought me today!!!!  Thanks Jaci!!!!!!!  You are awesome!

 

I left for Sleepy Hollow this afternoon at 4:30.  I was starving so I stopped for coffee and French fries…yum yum but now all I want is pizza…I saw this great vegan pizza recipe and now all I can think about is the pizza….but I am at a hotel and I cannot obviously make it.

 

So on my way to Sleepy Hollow, I enjoyed the music…most of the time.  You know you travel a lot when you do not have to hit the seek button in the car.  I think my favorite song is the new Paramore song…I think it came on at a great time…I know I sound like a broken record and I have a great time driving, but it can be borrrrrrring!!!!!!

 

So I had a blast.  I blared the music and cranked the window…”Don’t go crying to your momma…cause you’re on your own…in the real world…cause your on your own…”   So I enjoyed it…but the lyrics are right.

 

I need to keep doing these races and stop focusing on the fact that I end them alone.  I can have fun alone…I hope I do not become cat lady…but these races are a great way for me to get out.  Today was the first time I have ever had to drive on 17 east.  I realized tonight my night vision sucks….a lot!!!!!  This is also another reason why it would be nice to not drive alone.  I am wondering if I need to take half a day for my next travel race because my eyes just cannot take the bright lights.  I hated the turns and the road signs.  I didn’t feel like the safest driver. 

 

Soooo what should I confess tonight on the eve of Sleepy Hollow???  hmmmmm

 

I once learned that piano is good for your memory.  I started to take piano and became really good at it.  I could memorize music and I loved playing Bach…but there is a song called, “Largo.”  Largo is my favorite and I miss it.  I used to own a piano but I could not take it with me and I haven’t played in over two years.  I know I can’t sing worth crap anymore, but I wish I had a piano to practice on.  I found it relaxing.  I guess this is not the most exciting confession…hmmmm let me think of something good….

 

Besides the fact that I hate water, I get claustrophobic.  I can’t stand a bunch of people right near each other.  It is ridiculous and I hate malls around the holidays.  I went to my first concert this year and I don’t know if I could ever go to another one.  I fainted because I couldn’t breathe…it was too hot and there were too many people.  Maybe that makes me a people hater ha ha ha !!!!!!

 

Kidding…….

 

Happy Friday and good luck on your race if you have one in the morning!